The extinction of human relationships courtesy of Facebook

I've been giving this a lot of thought lately...and then while reading through yahoo news I come across an article about WSU's coach Mike Leach, who I actually am not a fan of, latest rant which turns out to be about the very topic on my mind.

Here's a copy of Mike Leach's quote: "I'm not really good with technology. All this button pushing and whatnot. I mean, you can just imagine based on what's happened in the last 15 years. Conversations won't happen 10 years from now. There aren't going to be people to talk to, it's going to be this (mimics pushing buttons). 'Do you want to go out on a date with me?' 'I don't know, what do you look like?' 'Well I look kind of like this.' 'OK, what are your interests?' 'Well, what do you think my interests are? Looking to this thing and typing into this just like yours are.' 'Yeah, no kidding, that's what everybody's doing.' 'Well, where do you want to go?' 'Well, what difference does it make? Because all we're going to be doing is looking into machines anyways.' Well, that's true and in the end, it's going to tough to perpetuate the species. There's no question about that. So we're all going to look in this box and eventually be extinct. That's how it ends."

While his quote is more specific to the decline of humanity or rather its extinction, my thoughts lately have been more focused on the mistaken importance of relationships within Facebook. Back in the before days...the long, long ago...before the internet anyway, if you wanted to be friends with someone it took effort. You had to make time in your life to call them, hang out with them, see a movie, go to dinner, hang out, do whatever...even if that whatever was drive around or hang at a park.  You made time in your life because it was real. But now, in the time of Facebook...you just click a button or send an emoticon. But as my exgirlfriend was known for saying "Facebook isn't real life." So true. I can't tell you how many times I have overestimated my status in someone's life because of Facebook. For example, I can talk everyday with someone on Facebook, send funny pictures and make stupid jokes back and forth with but when in the same room...we are strangers. But because of Facebook interactions, I'm expecting that to translate to the real world and vise versa. The problem, it doesn't and so the end result is...my feelings get hurt. My heart suffers needlessly and sends my brain into a horrible downward cycle of self hatred and confusion. This didn't happen in the long, long ago. It didn't happen before the internet. It didn't happen before Facebook.

You were friends or you weren't. You shared your life, you laughed, you loved, you cried, you were part of something bigger than yourself. Relationships as I once knew them are over. Sadly, I am finally coming to this realization after losing some "friends" either because I thought I meant more than I did, or because they thought they meant more than they did. Again, victims of the lies that Facebook shoves into our faces. We are led to believe in a reality that does not exist...for better or worse sometimes. I recently did an experiment with my Facebook account, to find out just how real any of my 288 "friends" really were...I deactivated my account (for several reasons, just one was for this experiment) and it took a week before anyone noticed enough to contact me. And of those 288, only 3 have actually gone out of their way to check on me, say hi or whatever.

That's not even 1% of my so called friends.

And what's even more depressing...ones I thought would contact me...haven't. So it begs the question, who are my real friends?

Lest you think I hate the internet and social networking...I don't. It has brought about amazing things. One of them, the main one in my opinion (aside from shopping that is) is being able to connect with people from around the world. People that before the internet and Facebook never really knew existed. And I have to admit that some of those distant people have brought some serious awesomeness into my life. The problem is that I'm not sure I can justify the sacrifice of having close personal friendships that are real to have "friends" on social networks that really when the chips fall, likely wouldn't give two shits about me.

Relationships were easier, less complicated and more straight forward before the internet came along. Before social networks connected the world with just a click. And it saddens me to say that, but more so to come to the realization that I have far less real friends in my life than I thought.