Forced Resignation

Below is a letter of sorts that I sent to my friends in OWRD regarding my recent "forced resignation" from the group...

For some of you, this will not come as a surprise since I have been talking with many of you on a regular basis about my thoughts and concerns regarding recent developments at OWRD and the actions of Flash by terminating my membership twice and then finally blocking me from the OWRD groups page. Over the course of the last few months, it slowly became apparent to me that my desire to be more involved (help coaching, cheer or encourage skaters-to which I was told not to do) with the league was being met with some resistance, only to finally be fully realized when I was told that my membership was terminated due to my involvement with other leagues. While it is true that I am part of the NSO hobo group (meaning NSO's that have home leagues but travel around to meet the demand of needed NSO's)...my home league is Jet City. I have never kept that a secret, however, I also have never broadcast my home league while at OWRD. I have not worn shirts with the names of other leagues or tournaments on them while at OWRD. Things I have posted or said in the past, were to promote skills, drills and the athletic aspects of other skaters or events. OWRD appears to be headed in a very different direction than what was originally planned...where teamwork, members of other leagues and community could come together to share knowledge and skills and be free to learn what they wanted and then move onto other leagues if they so desired. I also feel that the original motto of OWRD has been muddied and become lost...I fully embraced the envision of inclusiveness, belonging, increasing self confidence, making social connections, sportsmanship, positive attitudes and athleticism but those things have somehow been compromised. The final "straw" for me was the combining of various levels of skaters into teams...where lower levels will be on the same team as higher levels. This I feel is a disaster waiting to happen. There are skaters who have been working for over a year to become bout ready skating with others who have only been skating a couple months or less. I have noticed favoritism towards skaters with "more potential" all the while leaving those who are not deemed "worthy" to fend for themselves and get lost without more individualized attention. And even after concerns have been raised to those in power, changes have not been made and in fact, those who raise those concerns are punished by not being allowed to bout, being leveled lower, or losing their "admin" powers. It has become clear that Flash judges me differently than others...I am kicked out of OWRD groups page because I am not an "NSO, skater or ref" but other photographers are allowed to stay because they are not "affiliated with other leagues." This time last year I was putting many, many hours into the creation of OWRD...writing articles for magazines, mailing stickers all over the world, designing fliers, going to meetings, taking photos and editing them, getting the word out and even taking time away from my real job to help out any way I could...only to have Flash minimize my contributions and remove me from the group. So after taking all of these things into account, I have decided not to fight Flashes termination of my membership in OWRD. It is painfully clear that my time representing and working for OWRD has reached its end. I will continue to offer any advice and education to individual skaters, continue to cheer for and encourage those of you I have relationships with but I will not be involved with OWRD as a league. I will miss you all greatly but know that we will see each other in the future as the derby world gets smaller and smaller. I have enjoyed my relationships with all of you and look forward to continuing down the path of friendship. And it very much saddens me that OWRD could not be a safe place to foster those opportunities. I am an NSOhobo, and derby photographer...who just happens to have a home league by the name of Jet City. I will not apologize or diminish my role in those groups. I will not apologize for giving my all and trying my best. And I wish all of you good luck, fast wheels and only minor injuries that don't slow you down.

Sincerely, diz

Latest things that caught my eye

I always have the most to say when I'm not near the computer so much of my inner monologue gets wasted away. But that's a topic for another time, meanwhile I've been taking pictures like crazy and it's time to share some.

It's my girlfriends birthday...

Last night my girlfriend Lisa, her best friend Abbie and I went out for drinks/dinner at the Wild Rose in Seattle. This was the first time I got to really spend any time with Abbie and it made me feel very anxious. Not just a little anxious but like job interview type anxious. They have known each other for more than 20 years and Abbie is the closest thing to family outside Lisa's two small children, Gwen and Malcolm. I was so worried that Abbie wouldn't like me, or I wouldn't be what she thought I would be like. Worried she would disapprove of me and then Lisa wouldn't love me anymore. I know I was wound pretty tight initially, but after a nice shot at the bar, I think I chilled out a little. Photos were to be had and seeing how we were both goofy, we just sort of did our nerdy/geeky thing and without either of us knowing, Abbie kept clicking away with the camera. But frankly, I'm glad she did. I like this photo of Lisa and I. I was trying to bite Lisa's ear and she was in hysterics.

The bartender was nice enough to snap a picture of all three of us...that's Abbie doing the bunny ears thing to Lisa, who is the sexiest woman in the joint and it's easy to know which one is me...I have the hat on and I'm the fattest one there. Fluffy I mean.

After eating and drinking we headed to Babeland to take a gander at the latest in his and her pleasure toys. Then it was off to get our cupcake on before heading back to Abbie's to drop her off to play with her husband. Of course we were greeted at my car with a parking ticket...but whatever. It was a pleasure to meet Abbie, she is most open minded and seems very genuine and sincere. I can see why Lisa and Abbie are best friends. I don't know how my "interview" went but I feel like I failed it. 

I surprised Lisa by getting a hotel room in Edmonds so that we could spend the night together that is between Seattle and Everett...we both work Sunday morning and I didn't want her having to come all the way to Everett. It is wonderful getting to spend time with her, cuddling, talking, and just being relaxed together. We still are learning so much about each other. Sadly the hotel was by the train tracks so the trains kept her awake since I totally passed out so she didn't get much sleep. Which makes me sad. 

Today is her official birthday...so happy birthday baby. The last year of knowing you has been amazing, scary, fun and challenging. I wouldn't do a single day differently. I love you very much and I hope you had a great birthday weekend aside from having to work. I miss you very much but I'm so thankful for the time we get, whenever it is we get it. OXOXO.

For a great man...

Dear Fred,

I didn’t get you a card or a present, but thank you for my rocks. I know I said how much I adore and love you last night at your party, but I really want you to understand that I meant it with every fiber of my being. You have without a doubt been the best supervisor I have ever had the pleasure of working for. You have been supportive and helpful beyond measure and gone above and beyond the typical duties of a supervisor for not only me but the entire team. You have protected us to the best of your ability from upper management and taken the brunt of others attitudes and attacks about PACT. You believed in us when no one would give us a chance…

Speaking just on my own behalf, please know that you have a special place in my heart both personally and professionally. You afforded me opportunities that others may not have been given. You trusted that I knew how to do my job and you let me do it. You didn’t micromanage me, and let me have the freedom to make my own mistakes…but more importantly, you were there to help me pick up the pieces and learn from those mistakes. Other supervisors would have been quick to punish and criticize and I appreciate that you have always been gentle with my feelings and when I needed you, you were always there.

It is truly a major loss for both the agency and PACT losing such an amazing man and supervisor, but huge kudos for your new employer. I am sorry that management did not appreciate you more and treat you better. (But I’m sorry they don’t treat any of us well.) You have invested so much into the program and each and every one of us…it does not go unnoticed or unappreciated. I may never have a supervisor like you again, and I would be remiss if I let you go without making sure how much you mean to me. During my 4½ years here I have seen 44 people come and go and only cried when 3 have left. You are the 4^th. I will miss seeing you every day, hearing your stupid jokes and having you to go to when I need a shoulder to cry on.

I pray for you every morning and thank God (Universe) every day that you have been my boss. And I am truly happy that you are getting out of here before your soul withers and dies. I hope your new job is amazing and that you and your wife get more time together now that PACT isn’t a constant anchor. I wish you the best both personally and professionally and love you immensely. I already miss you so much…

With the utmost love and respect, deb

This weeks photos around town.

I don't want to post anything heavy or depressing tonight so I decided to post pictures from odd places around town or my yard. Nothing to crazy or super special, just things that caught my eye. The landscape is changing daily with the changing of the seasons, one day there could be just moss and grass and then the next day there blooms a flower. Which got me to thinking that just as in nature, we are all trying to climb our way out of the dirt to bask in the sun and show the world all our glory. A tired cliche I know but nonetheless relevant.

Happy birthday mom

Took mom out for dinner to Red Lobster, an annual tradition we do for our birthdays. Had some amazing food and super yummy drinks. We were even treated to some free ice cream with a candle so we could make a wish. I have no idea what mom wished for and I can't say what I wished for because then it won't come true. I love spending quality time with my mom, she is my best friend and I love and cherish her more than anyone in the world. I hope to someday be half as good a person as she is. The moon was out and looking all kinds if pretty and I had to snap a picture before leaving the restaurant.

Happy birthday mom, I love you so very much.

For my birthday

I was super tired this morning at the thought of going to work but I ended up having a really good day. Mom brought me a birthday cake and work sang to me. Monique and our imaginary child herald gave me Legos. I got free tickets to watch an indoor football game, it just happened to be the first game of the first year of the Everett raptors. Then I had to hurry to jet city scrimmage and I always have a wonderful time there. Lots of derby girls wished me a happy birthday and Marilyn Gun Hoe gave me some wrestling figure guys from the WWE match she and Grr Rawr Rawr went to.
Now I'm home and busily packing to go to the wild West showdown to show love and support to my beloved jet city rollergirls. But I'm really looking forward to spending three days with my girlfriend. All in all today was a pretty damn good day.